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Megan Kathleen Petrey <3
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User: [info]petreymk
Name: Megan Kathleen Petrey <3
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November 2008
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13th-Nov-2008 02:23 pm - Novemeber 13, 2008
Day two of work went really well.
I got to put up a lot of Christmas decorations and such.
It made me want to decorate for Christmas. I plan on it after I get a few paychecks.
You can't really decorate for Christmas until after Thanksgiving.
I have a good feeling about this Christmas.

I haven't talked to Kylie in a few days. It makes Megan a sad panda.
I rarely get on the computer anymore.

Justin is fixing the car today. That is swell.
And tomorrow I am going to my mom's house to help her sell some things on Ebay.
I really want to watch the new Kevin Smith movie.


I haven't much to update on.
Aside from the fact that Justin has decided to quit Steak 'n' Shake after he get promoted to RM and gets his license back.
11th-Nov-2008 11:17 am - November 11, 2008
I started my job at Dollar Tree yesterday, and it was very boring.
I basically get paid to do what I do anywho.
I walk around and pick stuff up and organize.
They're only going to work me a few days a week, which stinks.
I need to work more than that.
I am waiting for the car to be fixed to apply for that state job.
I feel like such a bum when I am not working or anything.

Justin makes me really happy.
I can't really explain it much further than that.
I just get a different feeling when I'm with him.

I keep thinking about Mr. Cooper, and I really want to write him a letter.
I haven't a clue why though, to be honest.
It is just a random urge.

I need stamps.

I always want to sleep, and yet I never do.
I don't understand why.

I told my mom that I am living here, and she was just like, "So, you're an adult."

I need someone to talk to before I explode.
27th-Oct-2008 05:05 pm - October 27, 2008
I have been searching for a job for quite some time now, and getting relatively anxious to hear back from any place.
I need a job, not only to help out with the bills, but for my sanity.
I cannot stand just sitting around all day -- it is going to drive me crazy.
I need friends, I need to get out and do something.
I have been exploring the area quite a bit, and I find that I like what I see.
Tomorrow I am going to take my camera with me. I have the greatest burst of inspiration.
I have been drawing more here lately and more in touch with my creativity.
Maybe it's this cabin fever.

I found an amazing book store yesterday, I could live there.
I want to go back, but I honestly don't have the money to buy any books, no matter how cheap.

What little bit I have at the moment I am saving for a trip to Goodwill in case I need a certain article of clothing for work, where-ever work may be.
I hope that I get hired soon.

I wish that Kylie was here, she would love it.
There is so much to photograph, it's so beautiful.
I miss Kylie more than I miss my own family.

I am sleepy all of the time it seems.
I get these random bursts of energy and then as soon as I start to do something, they're gone.
I think it's because I'm depressed.
I'm trying not to be though.

I got a honey stick today, like the ones from Old Fashion Days.
I haven't eaten it yet.
I'm saving it.

I went into this small health food store and I was talking to the owner, I felt so bad for him.
There wasn't a lot in it, and he seemed so eager for anything at all.
I could see it in his eyes.
I wish that I could have done anything to help him.

I left my stuff at the Dollar Tree, but was too embarrassed to call and ask them to hold my stuff.
It was only a few dollars worth of stuff, and it would be that much in gas just to go back.
I applied there, and I really don't want to look ditzy.
The guy acted like he would hire me.
I hope so, that was the largest Dollar Tree I had ever seen.
It was amazing.
They even had frozen stuff.

It was amazing.

I sent messages to people from Frankfort today, about 5 or 6 people.
They said:
"A random hello =)
Please don't think that I am strange.
I just moved to Frankfort and I wanted to say hello.
Perhaps you could give me an idea of anything at all to do around here.
Thus far I have managed to find a swell book store and some decent restaurants. Oh and that great coffee shop attached to the awesome book store."

I didn't want to seem too desperate, so I used just wanting to know the area as an excuse.

Only one person responded, and she was really nice.
I talked to her for a little while, until she had finished telling me about the area I suppose.
Then she just didn't respond when I tried to start other conversation.

Oh well.


16th-Oct-2008 06:28 pm - October 16, 2008.
Today has been so shitty it's not even funny.
I think that I have cried more today than I have in so long.

Eric has been a part of my life for so long, and all that I can do is hurt him.
I spent years by his side, trying me best, and I finally gave up.
And as soon as I gave up, he changed.
All that I manage to do is hurt everyone.

I hate myself most days.

But, it doesn't matter.
I can't let this get to me.
Justin doesn't want to see me sad anymore, and I can't deal with upsetting him anymore.
I have to be a better person.
14th-Oct-2008 06:35 pm - October 14, 2008.

I tried to run away from something without thinking.
I was so scared, and my brain shut down. I should really learn to communicate before running.
Then I would have known the truth.
I hadn't really realized just how much I cared until I left.
It took me about 5 seconds of being in the car before I realized that I shouldn't have gone.
It is so odd to care about someone the way that I care about him.
Sometimes I feel like we are so great for eachother.
I just have this horrible habit of creating a problem.
It's my way of escaping when I feel like things are going to work out.
I am too much like my mom sometimes.
But, after I left...I had this horrible sinking feeling in my stomach.
And I got so scared.
He turned his phone back on (when he didn't have the money) because of me.
I didn't see that one coming, in the least.
We had an amazing conversation last night, and we got everything straightened out.
I feel really bad for leaving.
I could have handled that so much differently.
I feel stupid now that I know the truth.

I feel like I'm not such a great daughter.
Or grand-daughter.
I rarely call my family.
And when I am down, I don't spend a lot of family time with them.
But, I am working on it.
I honestly am.
I have been calling my family members more often.
And I can tell that they're happy about it.
I love my family, I honestly do.
I didn't realize it until I was already gone.
I regret so many things.
I could have been so much better.
I could have done so much more.
But, as I said, I will be better.


I have been listening to the radio for the last couple of hours and I am getting ready to go crazy.
It's the same songs over and over.
0.0

I love that face 0.0

 

12th-Oct-2008 05:04 am - October 12, 2008
I had a random urge to get a livejournal again after all of these years. I've debated about whether or not I wanted to do so for the past while, and I suppose that now is as good of a time as any other could possibly be.
If you would have told me even a few months ago that I would be at this place in my life, I never would have believed you. Not even for a moment. My life has morphed into something crazy and unexplainable. I continually find myself longing to revert back to my childhood. If I have any regret in life, it was that I never allowed myself to be a child. My parents and I have had the same fight for years. They want to take care of me and I have never allowed them to do so. And now, when I need them, I am too terrified to even begin to consider asking for help. I feel weak for needing help. If I can just get everything straightened out, then everything will be OK.

So, to start this off, I would am going to attempt to define myself.
It will be something interesting to look back on in a few years.
My name is Megan Kathleen Petrey

I was born on May 12, 1991 in Bowling Green, Kentucky.
I have lived in Kentucky, Florida, and Mississippi.
My mother's name is Rebecca Sue Givens.
My father's name is Ward Leon Petrey.
I graduated in May of 2008 from Whitley County High School.
I have made a good deal of mistakes throughout my lifetime.
I skipped first grade because I was too hyper-active.
I am full of oddities.
I am allergic to: most metals, watermelon (and a few other melons), cats, dogs, and many soaps.
My favorite animal is an alpaca.
I lack passion for just about anything at all.
I long for anything at all in the world to make me feel the way that everyone else does.
I am embarrassed about my weight.
I feel like everyone can see my flaws.
I constantly worry in general.
I wish that I could read people's minds, I have strong interest in the cognitive cycle.
I suck at games.
I suck at giving directions.
I constantly second guess myself.
I like History.
I like music.
I love making others happy.
In fact the only time that I feel like I am at peace is when everyone around me is happy.
I always feel like I could be doing so much more.
I don't read as often as I should.
I am currently not working toward anything at all in my life.
I long to be working on something musically.
I want an ocarina.
This one to be exact:

I think that Pugs are the cutest puppies ever.
I want one desperately.
My best friend is Kylie Beth Sherman.
She is the better half of me.
I like water a whole bunch.
I'm not a large fan of soda.
I go through odd food phases.
I like MySpace more than I should.
I dye my hair too often.
I would absolutely love to live out in middle of nowhere away from society.
I'm a pushover and a half.
I don't get angry very often.
I have issues picking out my favorite anything.
Primarily because I am constantly changing.
I am Bipolar, and I can't stand it.
I feel like it is going to cause my demise.
I want to impact someone's life.
I love sleeping.
I love my crazy dreams.
My mind makes little to no sense.
It moves at a rapid pace.
I am looking forward to old age.
I am legally blind.
My vision is always getting worse.
I generally have a headache.
My spine is misshapen.
I am impartial, to just about everything.
My right knee pops indefinitely.
It's annoying during sex.
Porn makes me tummy turn.
I respect others more than myself.
I give everyone a chance.
I give out way past second chances.
I appreciate honesty.
 I try to be open about my feelings, in general.
I believe that you should live life the the fullest.
Happiness is all that matters to me.
I am not a materialistic person.
I have a huge whole in my heart for ugly things.
I am ready to embrace life.

 

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